break

It’s always disappointing when we find that the person we’re dating is just not the “one” for us. But, at some time or another, most of us will be in the position of thinking we want out of a relationship, and we need to know how to make the decision. Sometimes it’s pretty easy to know it’s time to get out, but other times we’re torn. To help make it easier to decide what to do, ask, yourself these questions:

#1What exactly is bothering me about the relationship?
Some issues are ones we can work with while others are “deal breakers”. For example, if your issue includes a big difference in basic values, such as ethics or honesty, you may have no option but to end the relationship. However, if your problem is that your partner works too much, there might be hope. You may just need to talk to your partner and see if they’re willing to change some habits to fix the problem.

#2How do I feel about the person?
If you’ve fallen in love with the person, you’ll likely be more willing to resolve differences than if the relationship is still casual. Taking the time to honestly ascertain your level of attachment can help avoid regretting your decision if you end the relationship.

#3Am I being realistic?
Take an honest look at your expectations in a partner and in a relationship. If you are constantly breaking up with the people you’re seeing because they don’t meet your expectations, then perhaps your relationship expectations are unrealistic. You’re never going to find someone who is perfect, so be sure you don’t let go of a quality relationship because you think “something better might come along”.

#4Am I prepared to make a clean break?
If you’re thinking about breaking up to get more attention from your partner, or to get them to work harder on the relationship, then you should rethink your plans. If you break up to get attention, your plan may well backfire.

Next month, we’ll look at how to deliver break up news.

taraBreaking UpBreaking Up,Differences,Love,WorkaholicsIt's always disappointing when we find that the person we're dating is just not the 'one' for us. But, at some time or another, most of us will be in the position of thinking we want out of a relationship, and we need to know how to make the...Advice and Tips for Online Dating